one week down, many many more to go

as of today, i have been on testosterone for one full week. woohoo!

hrm..it seems however that i can hardly feign excitement.. not too long ago i received a text message saying my father is being recommended to a Pancreas Transplant Program. not that he doesnt need it - he hasnt been able to stabilize himself for as long as i can remember - but its still kinda... shocking? i guess thats it. a part of me wants to cry. the other part is just..waiting to see what the heck is going to happen with the whole situation.

as far as transition is concerned.. i havent noticed any changes.. other than what i described yesterday. i think ill do a video tonight.. if i can muster up the energy/will. im a bit down now but not over-emotional. i did catch my face at a weird angle in the mirror a few minutes ago and saw that i have quite a bit of fuzz.. i should shave. been too tired lately in the mornings - i dont generally fall asleep well at night.

im a bit all over the place.. its the news im sure. im really anxious for my next shot and more changes and stuff. maybe itll push me out at work. hahaha..

gotta run

Ray